The V – such a powerful symbol.
In this case I’m thinking about the slight angle that leads one side in such a different place. What is a small angle at the bottom of the v is a larger angle at the top of the V and would keep growing were it to continue.
It’s like our lives; one small step in one direction has the potential to lead to a dramatically divergent place after a while. That is the theory I’m operating on right now as I continue walking through this mid-life crisis…
At most points throughout my day it seems nigh impossible to make a dramatic shift in my life – sell the house, pack it all up and start the bicycle journeying again; quit everything and go teach yoga to street kids in Brazil; start a focused effort to pull out ALL of the ivy in the Seattle city limits…
All of this seems so drastic and crazy and unattainable… and yet amazing at the same time.
However, what I do believe is that one small step in a different direction, a slight variation from the path I’m on now, could lead me to one of these places or any million other outcomes. The beautiful, (and terrifying), aspect of this is that I also don’t know where that outcome may take me and likely I’ve never even thought of it yet. One good thing about being old enough to be in the middle of a mid-life crisis is that I’ve learned enough to know that I don’t have all the answers; it’s actually not all in my head.
So, rather than feeling the need completely change everything I’ve always thought I was about and become someone new, I’m working on taking one step at a time in a new direction – not knowing where it will lead me (which truly is terrifyingly exhilarating), and focusing on being true to myself in the present moment. Being true to my gut, my soul, my instinct, right where it is now.
I heard a great quote this evening at an artist presentation I attended, several great quotes actually. The one that is sticking with me as pertinent now is this (I’m paraphrasing):
“Hopelessness is actually just impatience for the change we want to see.”
I love this!
What I hear from this quote is that today my job is to be here now, to allow the change to unfold and happen on its own time; perhaps to be curious about the change, rather than impatient for more change.
Ah, such wisdom. That’s what I’m going with for today – being with the change that is happening today, right now. Feeling the beauty in the small steps of each side of the V as they happen. And working on embracing the excitement in that, rather than the hopelessness of where the end of that angle of the V leads…
It’s a small practice, but that’s what I’m finding works.
With so much love.